‘Life is a series of meetings and partings

We meet to create memories

We part to preserve them’

         Having already taken the sacred marital vows that guarantee a lifelong celebration of a man- woman relationship, I thought all my vow taking had ended. I was wrong. Sulekha made me realize that I had some more promises to pledge.  And this time it had to be extended to multiple partners. If the previous ceremony was called marriage, this informal procedure also had a name. It was called friendship. 

      However, this was an exclusive kind of connection. Much different from all the other friendships I was earlier exposed to. And to solidify this commitment, it needed a separate kind of stance. Something I never knew I was capable of. You see, I was born in a small town where girls showering together or boys sharing beds were acts that were never frowned upon. But when a boy met a girl or vice versa a tag of nervous trepidation was innocently attached to what was considered a one point program- by the society, by the family and by us. 

     The word friend qualified only if the gender happened to be the same. Therefore in my teens nearly every male I met I just took it for granted he would either be a future, a present or an ex. And as a married lady, to be sociable with men, women or kids, especially outside the periphery of my own age group or my conformed circle of formal friends, was out of the question. And even though a lot of such misconceived wrinkles have been ironed out from society today, it still needed a lot of emotional prodding to make me commit myself to this new form of loyalty.   
 

       It was the sunny Anjana from the East who woke me up to a Sulekha world. What she didn’t’ realize was that she had woken a sleeping giant. I thought my husband would never forgive her for prodding my blogging cells because this new passion was slowly driving my sole attention away from family and friends. But when he got to meet the members of Sumba he was happy I had decided to stray out of my rusty cocoon. If, through Sulekha I made virtual friends that I could connect with intellectually, with Sumba I made some whom I could relate to on a mental as well as emotional level. Even my children are pleasantly surprised with the way I warmly interact with my newfound blogger friends, some of whom belong to their own age group. 

    Sumba, which initially started out with Antonio, Bunty, Keshav, Anjana, Mamta, Mulliner, Naad, Ekta and myself branched out to also include Svengali, Pratishtha and Tarun. Two more non-sumba members who I met and bonded with absolute warmth are Keshav and Sven’s bubbly and beautiful wives. Requieee was one of the first bloggers outside Sumba, who came all the way from Bangalore and gave me a surprise. I distinctly remember my cool acknowledgment and the initial detached conversation that followed. Almost ten minutes later, when Choco revealed it was Requiem I was talking to, my instinctive reaction was to rush over to where he sat and give him a warm hug.  

     After that I met the sweet Atims in connection with an HT article that she wrote on Blogging. Naresh Lalwani, another perfect gentleman, lives in our colony and I invited him over when Karthik Kannan had come over to meet the Sumba gang at my place. I met Charuavi just recently and V.S. Gopal was kind enough to drop in at my place with his son when he was in the neighbourhood. Both Charu and Gopal are distinguished people. Two chirpy young things, Resplendence and Iconoclast, I had the pleasure of meeting during the Kala Ghoda Festival. The other non-mumbaites that I met were Bloodlime and Sandeep Shete. Both are so reticent I can’t help wondering if there is an air of reserve embedded in the Pune climate. It was just a few days back that I got to meet Typical, a charming young lady from Vizag. The other visitors who not only crossed the seas but also my virtual world were the charming Maddy M, the fascinating Rollingstone, vivacious Red Strawberry, dignified Sue Menon and the sweet Pooja Nair.      

     What is so exceptional about Sulekha is that all Bloggers share a distinct bond that is difficult to explain. Perhaps because none here view friends through the filtered glass of gender or age! How I wish I could give a definite name to this relationship. But although whenever a new emotion is born, someone, somewhere immediately writes a song about it, I am yet to come across a phrase for this special type of affiliation.   

     And why you may ask am I making this blog sound like an emotionally charged farewell speech? Gosh no, I am not leaving Sulekha…that is another vow I have taken- to stay connected to Bloggers here Till death do us part. Or till the management for some reason decides to kick me out- whichever comes first. I am simply writing this because as a spouse of a government employee with a transferable job (which for some ensures a full Bharat Darshan), we sometimes have no choice. We will soon be leaving Mumbai and going to Bhubaneswar. And I’m writing this because yesterday I had to bid a heartrending farewell to Bunty, who as you all know right now is going through a difficult patch in her life.

       Like it has always been happening, new postings will probably foster newer friendships and the old will probably give way to the new. But somehow I feel that this time in my life, some of these unwritten laws of alliance will undergo a drastic change. Simply because not only are some bonds too implicit to be expressed, but because some ties are too real to be virtual! 

      In the memorial service yesterday I again realized that as far as death is concerned it is only tough for those that are living. When you die, you die. And only if the world wants to keep you alive, you will continue to live- in books, in memories and in some special hearts. But as far as goodbyes are concerned, it is tough for both the parties. And yet, when you go, you go. But thank god for technology, no matter where you go, as long as you blog on, you will always remain connected. If only there was a way to log on to the spirit world too. 

                                                                           
                                                                                                                                    Nargis Natarajan
P.S. Any Blogger visiting Bhubaneswar, please feel free to drop in a line so I can get to  meet you. I have mentioned only the names of the Bloggers I have met. I hope I get to meet a lot more in future